Tears of Laughter

What fools! The Bengals did their best Wile E. Coyote imitation, walking right into the trap LaBeau purchased from Acme this week . He bated us with an early touchdown into thinking that we found a crack in Pittsburgh’s design and we still haven’t realized the error in our ways.

“We can make adjustments when we’re dead. Right now we have a football game to win,” says Marvin’s logic. Or maybe Brat’s - it doesn’t matter. Nor does the outcome of last night’s yawn of a game. There were no surprises, no drama. It was Goliath effortlessly suffocating David in the sand. No big whoop.

The one interesting note of the night, however, was of Anthony Collins and Nate Livings making their NFL debut in a setting comparable to Helms Deep. The rookies held up surprisingly well and raise questions about the future of this offensive line.



As an astute mailman once pointed out to me, Levi Jones has never been the same since he was attacked by Joey Porter’s goons in Vegas. His health has been a consistent concern (though he has played games under some severe circumstances), and quite frankly, he’s slow. There are some who feel that Levi has never been that special and hasn’t deserved his previous pro-bowl consideration or the contract extensions he’s been offered. I won’t belabor the point about the ruinous decision of releasing Willie any longer, but since we all have to live with that mistake, does it not make sense to continue without Levi as well?

Now is an opportunity to test drive Collins as our starting left tackle. Next we host Baltimore, another gritty 3-4 defense that will apply some heat on the youngster. Might as well throw him into the flames while we’re irrelevant.

Another mildly encouraging sign is the play of Andre Caldwell. All I want this year for Christmas is for him to become the replacement for Glen Holt. Caldwell has shown that he can potentially return kicks and run decent routes, while Holt has shown us how to fumble kickoffs and drop passes. One would think the transition of the two would be a no-brainer, but that is specifically what’s wrong with this franchise: it too is a no-brainer.

I thought our only attempt at the wildcat formation was the perfect example of how we do things around here. We line up Cedric Benson - not the proven open field runner, Kenny Watson, or the sometimes flashy Chris Perry - in the shotgun, Daniel Coates - a man who couldn’t out maneuver a garbage can - next to Benson and Fitzpatrick - sadly, the most dangerous of the three - split out wide. Now that’s comedy. And the result? A four yard run up the gut. Man, are we hilarious sometimes or what?


Mojokong - Why is our media asking John Thornton about Chad Johnson?